2. thinks that Milk Duds, with their self-deprecating name and remarkably mild flavor, are the most apologetic of the boxed candies.
3. is reminding you that 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
4. thinks everything looks like a Mexican soap opera.
5. is reminding you that you can't force fate, you just have to let it wash over you like a spray tan that won't take because your skin is too oily.
6. is wondering if sharks are mean because they feel unloved, or do they just have a mean way of sharing their affection with others?
7. OK little Johnny, very good, dogs go woof, now what sound does a Giraffe make?
8. A fear of heights is illogical. A fear of falling, on the other hand, is prudent and evolutionary.
9. If at first you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie
10. It's a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes, Now, potatoes and duct tape and you may have a chance!
11. Do cats burp?
12. Don't knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while.
13. Sometimes when you make an omelet you've gotta break a few eggs. What's the alternative? No omelets at all. Who wants to live in that kind of world?
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